Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Sergey, First Orphan Son


What would it be like to be 14 years old and already know that you are a loser? The people who were supposed to love you and take care of you, Mom and Dad, didn’t and couldn’t. Although in this case the mom was well educated, she rejected her own family and married a man who was continually in trouble with the law. Their life together was a misery for both of them. He, after several attempts, hung himself. She out of guilt and grief became an alcoholic and eventually died. Their child became a victim of the street. Of course, this can happen to children anywhere in the world, even in affluent countries like America. But what happens to a child who is not in a country that can provide adequate social services for it’s poor and hungry? What happens to a child who has become an orphan simply because his parents were too selfish and self-centered to recognize their responsibility toward him and who had no one else who cared?

Young Sergey was one of the “unwanteds” of the world and the first young orphan boy that the Lena and husband Sergey decided to take into their family. They already had one son, Prohor (more about him in the next post), who was about the same age as Sergey. Once they determined he should be their son, Lena boldly went to the orphanage to ask permission to become his guardian. This was not a normal action for Ukrainians, even Christian Ukrainians, at this time. It was 6 years, 2004, before the government would establish a nation-wide program encouraging families and providing financial support for those who were willing to take orphans into their homes. A similar program was established for those wanting to adopt Ukrainian orphans. Lena and Sergey’s actions were prompted only from their devotion to God to do what His Word was commanding them to do, “Take care of widows and orphans.” (James 1:27)

Sergey had only been in the orphanage a few weeks, but already he had found a friend who was a model of good behavior and did well in school. Sergey, on the other hand, was and did the opposite. Sergey was sitting with his new friend when Lena came to talk with him. He thought, naturally, that she was interested in talking with his friend, not him. You see, Sergey had already determined that he was unworthy of an adult stranger’s time and conversation. He expected all adults to treat him badly. He did not expect to be called by name and when she explained that she wanted to take him home he did not believe her. He simply could not comprehend that it was true and that someone actually wanted him. She had to explain the situation to him several times before he understood.

Within a few days, the orphanage staff prepared the necessary papers and Lena and Sergey (father) became his guardians. He had an instant friendship with their one and only natural son, Prohor. But there were problems. Sergey began to reveal his secrets to them. First he confessed that he smoked and had for several years. He was addicted to nicotine and continued to smoke secretly, in the Borblick’s home, when he could. But that was not all. He was also addicted to alcohol and had a capacity to drink a great deal. He spent time every day thinking about how he would be able to get alcohol. But that was not all. Sergey had also, at his young age of 14, been introduced to sex and he liked that too. Lena and Sergey anticipated that bringing this boy into their family was going to be challenging. Now they were beginning to see the scope of that challenge.

Eventually, they also learned why Sergey had ended up in the orphanage. His parents were still living, but he was not living with them as their child. His father had left the family before he was even born, eventually committing suicide. His mother tried valiantly to raise him on her own, but she eventually turned to drugs and alcohol (she also died very young) and he was left to fend for himself. So, he made his life on the streets. He and his “street” friends made a practice of stealing and used the money they accumulated to purchase narcotics. He was also on the road to becoming addicted to drugs as well. His friends had been caught in the latest escapade, but miraculously, Sergey had escaped. In order to avoid getting turned in by his “buddies” and going to jail along with them, he went to the local orphanage and asked them to take him in. They willingly did this. Sergey already figured out that if he was in the orphanage, the staff would not want any bad publicity reflecting on them. So the chance of them turning him over to the police was very slim. Handing himself over to the orphanage was an escape for Sergey but not because he hoped to find reform there. In fact, he hoped to escape from there eventually too.

Lena and Sergey (father), after realizing who and what they had invited into their home, began to find ways to help him. They took him to church and the church members came alongside to encourage them and befriend Sergey. They began praying with him and for him as part of their family. In just a few years time, Sergey was able to finish the 9th form (equivalent to junior year of high school) at school, graduate, and enroll in the very prestigious Navy Lyceum. This school is very difficult to enter and has a very tough entrance examination. But, somehow, with the support and hope of a loving family, Sergey was successful. Through this education, he was able to graduate as a professional sailor and secure a job on a merchant ship.

Unfortunately, this was also Sergey’s spiritual decline. He began to make good money and take care of himself independently. He stopped going to church and became independent of his new parents and the government. Now, he has no close relationship with the family and is often out to sea for 6 months at a time. Lena and Sergey (father) are grieved about this. Although Sergey (son) was accepted by the family, the church, and even the youth group in the church, it was hard for him to refuse the lure of the world (no different, really, from some Christian teens in America). And, at least for now, Lena and Sergey are happy that he is not homeless, not in prison and not jobless. These would all have been Sergey’s future if the Borblicks had not been led by God to help this young boy. They feel that one day he will return to them and to his faith in God.

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